Neighborhood Watch

A-ha!  Finally a real neighborhood watch association has commenced in my hood.  As I have been an active member now the last few months my bloggings have ceased.  Although the shenanigans certainly haven't. 

Duplex #3 vacant yet again

New info arrived last night regarding the shenanigans I spy at Duplex #3. It currently sits vacant after the last resident had to move out last week.

Unfortunately slippers-in-the-snow lady died a drug related death on her couch. There had only been one remaining guy living there and he couldn't pay the rent without slippers lady's share. May she rest in peace.

Although I frequently blog in jest about my neighbor's shenanigans this one had a sad ending.
I await the arrival of our next neighbor with a definite weariness. I have been both mortified and downright amused by the range of characters to inhabit my neighborhood.

I see the 90-year old landlords, Ethel and George, have returned from the Florida sun to once again ignore their crappy tenants in their slum lordishy [sic] way. They have been cleaning up duplex #3 ever since the drama went down, they appear every so often to repaint or remove mold or whatever they have to do to get these duplexes filled with more tenants.

A bit of history, last summer my DH and I walked over to Ethel and George's summer residence in duplex #6 to let them know that we had seen a major fight go down outside of duplex #2 while I had been nursing my 8 week old at 3am. I had witnessed a group of people fighting a guy, push him down and kick him in the head. It was actually pretty horrible and after a frantic call to the police they dispersed rapidly and that was pretty much the end of it. I wanted to let Ethel and George know about this, I was certain they would be concerned. My DH and I told Ethel and she just stared at us blankly, completely unconcerned, and told us that she didn't observe this herself. Point taken.

Hoarders

Dear Neighbor,



Why?

5-0 NOT at the duplexes across from my house

So as I was enjoying my lovely Sunday afternoon yesterday I was interrupted by an undercover cop car, lights on, speeding down my street. It did NOT stop at the duplexes across from my house (to my surprise) and kept on to the end of the block. I wasn't in the mood to follow, plus was elbow deep in playing with the LO.

A minute later I did notice a young man running between two of my neighbor's houses....peering out from the bushes and looking up and down the street....and then bolting across the street only to run through the yards in the next set of houses. This must have been the feller they were looking for. I didn't have my camera near by but on my stroller walk I did happen to see these shenanigans at the end of the block.

These are the people in my neighborhood

My alley neighbors. Hoarders.

Nancy freaking Drew here

Hmmmm duplex #5 hasn't had a police visit in years. Not since it was inhabited by the teenage kid that liked to throw glass bottles in the street at 3am. But these gals are actually pretty cool.

Then again the police calls at these duplexes are near-daily and it no longer surprises me.
Off to investigate Nancy Drew style.

Crazies alert

Ah I see it's time for our daily run with our SARS mask. See you same time tomorrow buddy.

Evicted

Looks like pickup guy in duplex#3 is getting a forced eviction. Or is he forced to move out as a result of a breakup with slippers-in-the-snow lady. The cops have been watching him and forcing him to pack up suitcases the last 30 minutes or so.

Better get your valuables pal!

What's going on here?

I can not figure out what is going on across the street. It appears duplex #3 has about 3 or 4 cop cars there right now with lights blazing and everything. Another domestic dispute perhaps? The lady that wears slippers in the snow and the pickup guy may be having a riff.



A few weeks ago an ambulance was called and slippers lady was brought out in a stretcher sitting up. She looked fine to me but perhaps she likes getting $3,000 bills for ambulance rides that aren't really emergencies.


Of course there happens to be a cop going in and out of townhouse #2 amidst all this chaos. The local PD should have their personal parking spaces in front of these townhomes.

CONFUSION ENSUES.

Albino Squirrel = dinner

This little feller leaves half eaten apples and corn cobs on the top of my fence posts. When I unlatch my gate these nasty compost items fall on my head. Seriously how does this squirrel precariously perch this crap on the door posts. Just look at him with his pink beady eyes.


Every autumn he somehow manages to find miniature pumpkins, I think he takes them from one of my neighbors' Thanksgiving displays, and eats them on my porch and roof. I have found many miniature pumpkins in my gutters. I hate this A$$hole.

The Dude on House Arrest Across the Street

As a stay-at-home mom I am home a LOT. The man on house arrest living in the duplex kiddy-corner to my house has a loud voice and talks on his cell phone while smoking outside all of the time. I hear every effing-heimer and shizzle cuss word out of his mouth....along with all the children in the neighborhood. Now my baby has yet to utter a single word besides ba ba ba ba but I am not incredibly excited about the day he understands that his house arrested neighbor is on his 4th D-dub but that it wasn't his fault. Oh plus apparently his live-in girlfriend is a beoyotch + more. I have had to call the cops on this house a handful of times over the last few months

Latest Shenanigans Update: Apparently the crazies under house arrest and the invalids in the duplex next door have a connection, not sure how. I often see some big lady wearing only a nightgown and slippers walk in the snow from duplex 3 to duplex 2 and make visits. I am so confused....